Operation Transformation

After seeing the programme's high success rate on the pudgy people of Ireland, its presenter, Gerard of the Ryans, has decided to undergo the process himself. It has been another great success for Gerard and RTÉ in general.

Gerry has really embraced his new image and to go along with this, he will now spell his name Jeri. It has given him a new lease of life and he has found an interest in Star Trek. He wishes to thank the producers at RTÉ and old Gaybo for the advice over the years.

Well done to Gerard, or Jeri, as we should now be printing. Good luck.